Overheard somewhere in ever ever land.
Son: Dad, how do I know if I’m in love?
Dad: Well, son that’s not really all that hard at all. The big thing is you need to constantly talk about the girl. You don’t need to actually talk to her but you do need to talk about her.
Son: Really? That sounds so weird?
Dad: Not really Son, think about the more you talk about her, the better you’ll get to know her
Son: Great point, Dad. What else?
Dad: Well, after that, you want to make sure you take everything she says to you and try to dissect what it means. You don’t have to actually do anything about it, just talk about it as much as you can.
Son: Won’t she want me to eventually do something?
Dad: Not really, the most important thing is that you just discuss what she meant by what you said. A word of advice here, I’d make it as vague as you can so that you can create as long a conversation as possible. That way, you can limit how much you actually have to do. The beauty of this Son, is that if you do it right you’ll never have to actually do anything with her.
Son: Dad, isn’t that kind of the point of falling in love?
Dad: (Hearty Laugh) No Son, I can tell your new at this thing. Love isn’t about spending time with a person. Love is about you. See, the next step is to do a lot of “things” for you, but say it’s for her. The beauty in this is that you can actually make her feel sorry for you. You can show all your actions to other people and let them see how much you love her.
Son: But Dad…
Dad: Hold on Son, this actually leads right into the next point. Make sure you tell other people about how much you love her all the time. Keep a list of all the things you do for her and always tell other people about her. This will impress them and her. Most importantly, it will make you feel important. It helps to remind her how lucky she is to have you love her.
Son: But Dad, what about spending time with her, listening to her and that kind of stuff?
Dad: Son, if you do that where will you find time for you? You’re a young man, you have to decide do you want to live for yourself, or for her? I mean, you have to understand Son, love is a lot like sitting on a chair…
Son: Dad! I don’t want to sit on her!
Dad: I know Son, that’s just a metaphor to help you love her more. The key Son, is to not let her get too involved in your life. After all, it is your life, you need to live it the way you want to live it. You don’t have to do too much for her, just enough so that you can make your list look good.
Son: Well, Mom said that love is about the other person, it’s about being willing to die…
Dad: Die! Whoa, wait one minute. Your mother’s a woman, what does she know? The key is to be willing to talk about your willingness to die. If you do that, and the key here is to do it loud enough that people ignore the times you fail to actually sacrifice anything for her you should be good to go.
Son, love is like medicine, a little bit of it is a good thing , but too much of it can be bad for you.
Dad: Son, I know you’re young and right now, you want to really love this girl, but don’t worry over time you’ll feel the same way I do now. It’s inevitable. Don’t let your mother fool you into thinking that you need to go all nuts on this love thing.
Son: But Dad, I want to spend my time her, I want to hear what she has to say, I want to…
Dad: I know that’s true right now, but overtime as you get busy doing more things for yourself, you will start to see that I’m right. That’s why you need a plan right now.
The last piece of advice I’m going to give you is the best. You need to spend more time talking about what love means. Pose questions about what love looks like? What would happen if you did love? Get people talking about love. This is important, you can even read about love. But Son, I’m telling you, don’t go crazy. Don’t do anything that would make you uncomfortable. Don’t sacrifice too much. I never did, and I turned out just right. The key is to avoid action at all costs….
***Reception faded and conversation was lost****
Obviously, this is my attempt (poor as it may be) at satire. Recently, I’ve been challenged with the idea of what it looks like to love Jesus. I hope you enjoyed this post and maybe it spoke to you too.